23.8.10


Been playing the piano lately. A LOT.

For a Beethoven piece I have to play 6 notes in literally one second. And that goes on for almost a minute in strict time. And then a few times again for the rest of the piece. Arthiritis much?

I like to play Chopin's Nocturnes with my eyes closed because I feel that way I can escape. And also dream at the same time. I don't have to keep the tempo constant so I can just run at whatever pace I like.

You might see those smart asian kids playing some epic piece. I'm not one of them. and well, its not that easy..

Also now that I have a new teacher the lessons are pretty damn expensive. Been working up to my grade 8 and I better not fail this time else I will become bankrupt and I have to start all over again with a new syllabus for the new year '11 and that means learning new pieces again. yeah, before I failed TWICE by only a few marks >< first time round of failing was bad. second time round was a nightmare. If theres a third time that would just depress me so much... because i spend so much effort, energy, time and money into picking myself back up and hope to improve but seems like nothing has changed except that knowing theres a limit to how many times I can fall and put myself back together again.


Sometimes I question what is the point of putting all this effort.

But I play for the people I like just hoping they will listen and enjoy the music.


[yeah this is unusual for me to post stuff like this on my blog but i feel the need to .. say, be emotional. erm thanks if you happen to read all this (:]
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4 comments:

  1. Anonymous24/08/2010, 19:08

    Hey Grrace
    I am sorry you feel defeated. Just hang in there, you will get it right! You can DO it!
    As long as you try again, you are never considered a failure. Failure is falling and staying on the ground. You keep picking your self up.
    It is okay to be emotional. We’re females; we can get away with that!

    P.S: I hope this brings a smile to your face: I HAVE THE INTERNET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Love: Charm

    ReplyDelete
  2. Grrace24/08/2010, 19:55

    Thanks Charm for the support, :)

    ..also at times I feel i'm letting down my parents as well, because they've been spending the money to help me with this. and I can't 'complain' about it in front of them if you know what i mean..... I just have to keep on practising even when my hands get sore T_T.. But I'm not gonna quit because I've come so far already. Although to be honest I was lacking enthusiasm in the first place so at times its difficult to have the motivation to keep going. I just desparately need to get over this milestone ><


    BUT ANYWAY, enough of my rambling, don't feel obliged to read all that ^^"

    YAY you have internet!!!! now you can browse online to your hearts content :D hope your summer has been good! x

    Grace

    ReplyDelete
  3. Anonymous13/12/2010, 19:47

    I looooooove the piano. I was invited to a church yesterday here in Manhattan and it was so nice. They had a service called Lessons and Carols in which the Word was translated into eight different languages and organ playing and piano playing took place. I was so mesmerized when the woman played the piano.

    It made me want to get back into my musical talent: the flute. I played flute for six years before joining the military and taking up a new skill.

    Music is beautiful and is a wonderful gift that can be shared with the world. It is a release and a way of sharing your feelings at the same time.

    Hang in there. Don't give up what you love to do. It seems to be something you connect very dearly with. Ask your teacher to lessen the amount if possible since you are a consistent student. Tell him or her how you want to continue; however, due to the cost you may have to start looking elsewhere if he/she cannot accomodate your financial request. Good luck! Things have a way of working themselves out.

    Be blessed.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Grrace13/12/2010, 21:23

    Aww thank you cutie for your message x ^0^

    I realised how truly lucky I am to be have the opportunity to actually learn how to play. (:

    ReplyDelete

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